That title has little or nothing to do with what I will record now. Some thoughtful person has been messing with my privacy for a month now,and it just shocks me how severely sick some people can get. Punishment is on the way though,not to worry. And I have no intentions to heal that person’s sickness. As a matter of fact I fantasize about inflecting physical pain on him. It’s now my ultimate craving, a burning desire within me to hear whatever voices of pain and suffering he can produce. That would be a sight now! A mental pervert in pain… oh how I crave it!

I am becoming paranoid.. obssessed with the idea of “safety”, which is really just an illusion. I am never safe, not online, not in reality, be it in the supermarket or in my bed, in the bathrrom or on the street. Never safe. Not even in the arms of a lover. This applies to you too. Be careful, be very careful. Leave no traces,no clues,and certainly no pictures or written material that can tie you down to any period of your life that you would want nobody to know about. The world is full of crazy people, and they are after ME!

I am a weirdo magnet. That said, it just seems natural that curious things happen in my life. I just tore out pages of my diary, and I intend to dispose of them. I am going nuts but if it means being a little bit safer or closer to that sweet illusion of safety that tickles my dreams then by all means, I’m your favorite fruitcake!

How many people know where you live?How many people do you think have your email address?How many people have pictures of you?How many people know your name?How many people have your number? Do you really know? Do you really know them all?

When we want to jump rope we should “find our own rhythm”. I lost my rhythm in this place… It absorbed my creativity and I am now waiting for a break out… It seems as though the two contrasting realities of my life,the first being my life back home and the second being my temporary stay here, it seems as though they are just ripping at my patience. I’m tired. I realise much too clearly what I miss, both here and there. but this realisation doesn’t help but to increase the contrast and never to start a bridge. I’m stuck… I won’t let this stop me.