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Countdown to Annihilation

In Bizarro on September 1, 2008 at 5:40 pm

Just today I was telling a friend that we all should be nuked. The idea keeps haunting me as the ultimate antidote to our malicious, parasitic existence. I think it even when I try to be optimistic, which is in itself a failed endeavor every time.

But I have some news. In just nine days, the Large Hadron Collider will be switched on, and unless the legal case against this action is won it definitely will rock our world. Assuming someone makes a mistake somewhere, or leaves an inch of space unchecked by “strict safety assessment measures”, or is in any way as misanthropic as I am: we will all vanish into a black, black hole.

I take back what I said before. I prefer this scenario to Armageddon or Judgment Day. At least this way we would die because we were too smart and yet too stupid at the same time, which are entirely real human traits, as opposed to being sheep-like and waiting to be herded into some vast clash of civilizations while a thought we call god revels in our trivial misery. Actually wait, that also sounds pretty human and common…maybe that’s the real reason why we should be nuked.

Switch The Collider on, CERN brains, and to the rest of you I say: let us await salvation in the form of a big, ugly, black hole. Mark your calendars, pray that something goes wrong, and embrace the light.

  1. Check Soundgarden’s Black Hole Sun

    video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qiSkyEyBczU

    info: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black_Hole_Sun

    The concept of total annihilation is an option, especially given the total selfishness of the self-proclaimed “only intelligent creature on Earth”, but its rather an easy one, and unfortunetly will include all the other species.

    I would tend to choose some other “more difficult” options - revolutionary changes anyone?

  2. ” We stand encircled by wing and fire
    Our deepest ties return and turn upon us
    The shrouded reason, the bleeding answer
    The human plague in womb
    Bring clouds of war
    Let us rest
    Our future breed is the last
    In the conscience waits
    Dreams of the new sun
    We’re blood in the dust
    Given to the Rising
    Through this we claw roots
    Of trees in the world of iron
    Our father’s steps fueled the boiling sea
    The wretched harvest reaped by the hands of dawning
    Our pain cannot forgive the silent machine of the fatal flaw in man
    That brings us to the end ”

    - Neurosis

  3. Why makes you sure that if we’re all nuked the coming generation won’t be worse?

  4. Hareega, refer to 3adnan wa Lina.

  5. I wonder how does it feel to be tangential to the event horizon! Wow can’t wait!

  6. Wow, that’s a cheery one. The good news is that those guys at the collider are actually too smart to blow you up. So, you’ll just have to wait it out for the stupid ones with the bombs.

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